Art in the Park

It has already been five years since London held the 2012 Olympic and Paralympic games. Years of preparation took place beforehand, building new venues and creating a sporting complex for an event that would only last a few weeks. However, unlike the situation in Rio after the last Olympic games, London has not abandoned this expensive project and is continuing to use and develop the Olympic Park today.  Christened the Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park in commemoration of the Queen’s diamond jubilee in 2012, the area was developed into the largest urban park in Western Europe by restoring wetland habitats and cultivating native plants.

Of course, the original Olympic arenas are still in use and sit within the park in all their quirky architectural glory. The London Aquatics Centre has been open to the public since 2014 as has the Lee Valley VeloPark at the opposite end of the park. The Olympic Stadium, now known as the London Stadium, is home to West Ham United Football Club and British Athletics, both making use of its multi-purpose arena.

During the construction of the Olympic Park, designers and landscapers were fully aware of the impact the project would have on the local area. In order for Londoners to benefit from the park, they chose to incorporate creative features so that the final outcome would not be completely sports oriented. In 2011, The Legacy List charity was set up to support the games but also to create connections with the general public by commissioning art installations and educational enterprises.

The art installations are still displayed in the park, reflecting on the landscape, history and local memories. Artists from far and wide were invited to participate, resulting in some unconventional outcomes. Some may not be much to look at whilst others may be easily overlooked, however, they all have interesting stories behind them.

DSC00055

ArcelorMittal Orbit

Due to its 560 acres, it is not possible to see all the artworks in the park on one visit, but there are a few that are unmissable from the moment of entry. In fact, one can be seen from a distance and has attracted many visitors since its re-opening to the public in 2016. The ArcelorMittal Orbit stands at 114.5-metres and is the tallest sculpture in the United Kingdom. Originally commissioned by the Mayor of London in 2012. Sir Anish Kapoor and Cecil Balmond’s intricate continuous loop of recycled steel has been converted into a 178-metre tunnel slide that takes daring visitors spinning around the structure twelve times at the same speed it takes World Record Holder Wayde van Niekerk to run 400-metres.

The Mayor, Boris Johnson, originally commissioned the construction because he thought the park needed “something extra”. Designers were given the task of blueprinting ideas for an Olympic Tower from which Kapoor and Balmond’s concept was chosen as the winner. This brings about the question as to what the other designs looked like and why this contemporary eye-sore was selected above them all. At least the views from the top promise to be impressive.

The other fairly noticeable artistic feature in the park is Keith Wilson’s Steles. Thirty-five coloured poles ranging in height between 3 and 5-metres are found along the side of the Waterworks River which flows through the park before joining up with the River Lea. Although 8-kilometres of waterways flow through the park, Wilson’s Steles are only situated in a small section. Painted in the colours of the Olympic rings, these Steles look like giant crayons, however, are meant to resemble nautical waymarkers. These were the first art installation to be completed in the park and have a physical function as well as an aesthetic one. Due to their position in the water, they can easily be used as mooring posts for barges and small boats that float along the river. Alternatively, they make good roosting posts for the local black herons.

Other art installations are less noticeable until you stumble across them whilst exploring the park. Some may not even be noticed unless you are aware of them, to begin with. Hidden behind the Aquatics Centre is a utility building that has been used as a canvas by the artist DJ Simpson. Commissioned by the Olympic Delivering Authority, Simpson’s peculiar artwork, Open Folds, was installed in March 2012 to represent the contours of the neighbouring landscape. Constructed of dark anodised aluminium, Open Folds hugs the outside walls of the building. Simpson has punched out holes and formed patterned lines to emphasise the varying shape of the surrounding terrain.

In the main section of the park, another building has been used to display an installation of 2000 wooden cubes. One wall of the Podium Café is the location of Pixel Wall by the London-based design collective known as Tomato. The interactive wall allows visitors to turn the cubes, which have a mix of light and dark surfaces, in order to create different pixellated images or words. This is something that appeals to most visitors who cannot resist touching and playing with the cubes and discovering their creative potential. Despite clear instructions not to, vandals have unfortunately written on the cubes, ruining the overall aesthetic of the artwork.

DSC00067

The Fun Palace by Caroline Bird.

All forms of art were involved with the development of the Olympic Park and, although they all resulted in something tangible, they did not necessarily begin that way. As well as artists and designers, poets were invited to contribute their thoughts and words. On a wooden shed by the South Lawn is an engraved verse from a poem written by Caroline Bird.

Titled The Fun Palace, Bird’s poem narrates the life of Joan Littlewood (1914-2002), a theatre director who was heavily involved with the Theatre Royal in Stratford. During her career, she dreamt up the idea of a “Fun Palace” – an arts and education centre. She envisioned this building on the site of the park, however, her ambition never came to fruition. In honour of what would have been her 100th birthday in 2014, Caroline Bird penned this poem in celebration of everything she did for the artistic community in Stratford.

Other poets have also produced verses to be displayed around the park that reflect on the local area and its history. Lemn Sissay, a local author, was the first to be commissioned to write for the London Olympics. He provided three poems – Living Is In; Spark Catchers; and Spark – which are all exhibited in a similar manner to Bird’s poem. Carol Ann Duffy, who was appointed the Poet Laureate in 2009, also contributed with a poem about Eton Manor, a former leisure centre in the area.

John Burnside, a Scottish poet, was inspired by the suffragette, Sylvia Pankhurst, who was known to cycle around the area whilst campaigning for women’s equality. With this significant piece of history in mind, Burnside wrote Bicycling for Ladies, which has also been etched into wood, along with visual imagery.

Sylvia Pankhurst

I dreamed you came again

through the smog of time,

match-girls and broom-makers,

cycling from street to street

with The Women’s Dreadnought;

the houses lit for miles,

like beacons

and a true friend

– Extract from Bicycling For Ladies

DSC00090

Made of glass and steel, and standing 9-metres high, Monica Bonvicini‘s artwork is hard to miss from the road passing the Copper Box Arena. Functioning as a mirror by day and sporting neon lights by night, the Italian artist’s contribution has an ambiguous meaning. Is it referring to the athletes at the Olympic Games, or is it instructing people to run for their lives?

 

DTA0065Y_01.tif

Freeze Frame by Neville Gabie

 

Not all the artwork that has featured in the Olympic Park remains on public display. In 2012, Neville Gabie was appointed artist in residence for a period of 16 months. During this time, he created a series of work using film and photography. In one film, he recorded his attempt to sit on every seat in the stadium. His most imaginative outcome, however, is the recreation of George Seurat’s Bathers at Asnières (1884). By carefully placing people in high visibility jackets, Gabie reimagined the famous painting in the modern setting of the Olympic Park.

Although not commissioned as an art installation, there are two famous structures that attract many visitors and make great photograph opportunities. These are, of course, the Olympic Rings and the Paralympic Agitos. Located either side of the River Lea, these relics from the Games will remain as a reminder that the park was where the majority of the events took place. For whatever reason that you have gone to the Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park, seeing the Rings and the Agitos is a must.

Despite being transformed into a recreational public parkland, it is impossible to erase the success London had in being the host city of the Olympic Games. Along with the Rings, Agitos, and arenas, facts and memories of the Games have been dotted around the park. The entrance near the Aquatics Centre has a series of facts spread over the pathway, reminding people what London and its athletes achieved, as well as informing the future generations. There is also an opportunity to try and beat Greg Rutherford’s long jump world record of 8.31-metres.

The park has been made child-friendly with the addition of playgrounds containing several different climbing frames, swings and slides to enjoy. These have been designed as abstractly as the buildings and structures surrounding them, in keeping with the contemporary appeal of the area. During the summer, Children can enjoy racing through the water fountains as they turn on and off at great speed.

The park, architecture, and artworks have not appealed to everyone, resulting in a lot of criticism, including in the national papers. The architecture critic for The Guardian expressed the opinion that “There is a frenzy of wacky light fittings, of playground installations, of seats, tree species, sculptural lumps of granite, kiosks, railings and coloured surfaces…It suffers from an Olympic syndrome, where everyone wants to be a Mo or a Jessica and make their mark … Great care was taken to make the Athletes’ Village aesthetically orderly, to the point where it began to resemble Ceausescu’s Bucharest: this eruption makes such efforts futile.”

It appears that the developers have tried too hard to make everything look modern and have ultimately created something that looks obscure and slightly alien. Unlike the natural parks around Britain, the Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park feels false and overcultivated. Attempts have been made to produce gardens of foreign plants, including those from Asia and the Southern Hemisphere, however, this increases the unnatural feel of the park. Granted, the park is clean, neat and well looked after, but it looks too perfect to be considered parklands. It does not help matters that between the arenas and different “green” sections is an abundance of concrete pathways. The roads crisscrossing the park are a nuisance too; it is impossible to forget you are in London.

The Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park is still being developed as new installations and areas are added to improve visitors’ experience. No doubt more artwork and perplexing architecture will be added to the area over the coming years. With different events happening throughout the year, there is always something new to attract tourists to the area, making the park a worthy project.

Whether or not contemporary art appeals, it is still worth taking a trip to the Olympic Park. We are fortunate to have free access to a place where British history was made and, hopefully, always be remembered.

The park is a short walk from both Stratford Station and Stratford International Station. There are also many buses in the area, making the park easily accessible. Facilities are available for children, adults and disabled to ensure that everybody gets the most out of their visits. Numerous cafés and restaurants are on site and there are plenty of staff to help if you need directions or would like a tour of the park.

Download the Art in the Park field guide for more information about the art installations and where to find them.

Advertisements

Kathryn Lawes: Creative Box

Ambitious graphic designer and illustrator, Kathryn Lawes, like many young artists, dreams of having her own design company. However, it is a competitive world, and starting small is the only way to go. Having earned a degree in Graphic Design after three years of study at Portsmouth University, Kathryn has proven her desire to create by taking on the odd commission brief.

When starting up as a freelancer, it is very difficult to earn enough money to live on, therefore ex-students often end up in dead-end jobs whilst they try to get themselves known in the world of their desired profession. Kathryn, however, has been particularly lucky in landing herself a job at an architecture company, Thrive Architects. This may not involve the style of design and illustration she ultimately wants to be working on, but it provides the opportunity to develop her skills. And, at the end of the day, it is the vital experience that graphic design companies or prospective clients are on the lookout for.

D17474745_10154646198504387_67877695_nuring the limited spare time available, Kathryn also takes on freelance commissions. She has worked on branding jobs, produced children’s picture books, and has also branched out into mural painting. But, the thing she enjoys most is drawing and illustration. As a child, Kathryn was asked what she wanted to be when she grew up, and she said “an illustrator”! And, now it appears her childhood ambition could actually turn into a reality.

“I love to bring a story to life,” Kathryn explains. Using mainly watercolours and pen, Kathryn’s illustrations lend themselves towards children, the soft colours and smoothness of the final outcomes being particularly attractive to young minds. With already one in print, Kathryn is currently working on a second book based on the Six Behaviour Strands used by the client, the Primary Behaviour Service (PBS). Rather than focusing on National Curriculum subjects such as Maths, English and Science, PBS concentrates on six areas: Focus, Independence, Resilience, Respect, Boundaries and Self-Regulation.

The first book in the PBS series is titled It’s Just Too Noisy, and teaches children about how to focus. Using her favoured illustration style, Kathryn introduces Barney, a rabbit who wants to relax and read his book. However, each time Barney settles down to read, he is distracted by loud noises. Unlike traditional stories, It’s Just Too Noisy invites children to engage with the story and its conclusion by deciding what Barney should do next. A choice of two actions leads to contrasting scenarios, thus educating children about the more appropriate ways of reacting in difficult situations.

barney-rectangle

Kathryn’s love of children’s illustration stems from her own childhood.

My biggest inspirations are my Mum and Walt Disney. When I was little, my Mum would use up old tiny pots of paint by painting on my furniture various characters from Disney films. I remember having a big white toy box with some of the puppies from 101 Dalmations on, which I loved! I have always loved the Disney hand-drawn style animation illustrations, and I guess this is what fueled my desire to draw as well.

Alongside her decorated furniture, Kathryn’s strongest art-related memory is winning a design competition whilst at Primary school. The task was to create an advert and logo to promote Walk to School week, and Kathryn’s illustration of a book bag with legs landed her with first prize. Embedded in her memory is the day the Mayor of Havering personally congratulated her on her winning entry. “… a huge car with little flags at the front pulled up … a very important man got out of the car and then he came and told me how brilliant my work was! ”

83As an illustrator, Kathryn does not only concentrate on child-targetted artwork. One of her favourite pieces of work to date is an illustration of a classic racing car. Inspired by the vehicles on display at Santa Pod Raceway, Kathryn has created a small series of vehicle illustrations, including a few as commissions. However, it is her first attempt at this new genre that Kathryn is most proud of.

Taking her illustration skills to new levels, Kathryn has recently added mural design to her repertoire, charging reasonable prices for beautiful wall art. Like any professional designer, Kathryn liaises with the client to make sure the outcome is exactly what they want but also employs her artistic eye to suggest the best method of achieving their wishes.

Thanks to her childhood fascination with Disney films, Kathryn is expert at replicating the original Disney characters and has often incorporated these into wall murals. Whilst cartoons are popular for children’s bedrooms, Kathryn is also skilled in typography, and faultlessly applies words or quotes to the layout. Details, including prices, can be found on Kathryn’s Creative Box website.

Kathryn’s dream is to have all six books in the PBS series published and to continue working in the graphic design field. As with all students and graduates, Kathryn has experienced ups and downs, competing against other designers as well as her own confidence. Yet, experience leads to knowledge, and Kathryn leaves us with some sound advice: “Keep Going. Honestly, the best advice is if you keep pursuing and persevering … you are much more likely to reach [your goals]. Never give up … you will never find out what potential you had.”

Kathryn’s portfolio can be found on Creative Box as well as her personal blog. She is also on Facebook and Tumblr.

 

The Art of Money

57504729130000fb073835e0

As of 13th September 2016, the Bank of England issued its first ever polymer note. The £5 note is the first to be printed on this thin, flexible material, and, although smaller in size, is considerably more durable than its paper predecessor. They are also a lot harder to counterfeit.

Until the new note was released, I had not thought about the actual appearance of our money. Apart from displaying the Queen’s head and being different colours depending on quantity, the rest of the design felt insignificant. However, there is a lot of thought put into the composition of our banknotes.

The Bank of England Museum in London currently exhibits a Banknote Gallery, containing all the note styles and designs from 1694, when paper money came into existence, right up until the latest polymer version. Following the timeline of notes throughout history reveals the development of the visual appearance and the increasing intricacy of their design.

The museum provides information about the new fiver, how it was made, and explains the reasons for the choice of design. Including the current £10, £20 and the £50 note in their display, they also interpret the varying features many people may not have noticed. Our money is a lot more interesting to look at than we think.

The New £5

As most people in the UK will know, the paper £5 note featured the portrait of Queen Elizabeth II on one side, and Elizabeth Fry, an English pioneering Quaker from the Victorian-era, on the reverse. Although the Queen’s image remains the same, the historical character has been changed. The polymer note presents the face of one of the most famous Prime Ministers of the past; Winston Churchill.

Incorporating the 1941 photograph of Sir Winston Churchill taken by Yousuf Karsh, the bank has decided to celebrate the life of the British statesman who had a significant role in the UK’s modern history. Churchill was Prime Minister during two significantly life-altering events. The first occasion (1940-1945), were also the years of the Second World War, meaning Churchill had a lot of important decisions to make, and a country relying on him to protect them from the hostile Nazis. His second term ran from 1951 until 1955 and contained a much happier event – the coronation of Queen Elizabeth II.

Knowing the historical significance of Sir Winston Churchill makes the rest of the design more meaningful. Below Churchill’s portrait is a phrase that he is famous for saying during his first term as Prime Minister: “I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat.” This came from his first speech in the House of Commons after taking up his new position. Of his three famous speeches, this line is one that is remembered most.

To Churchill’s right-hand side on the polymer note, is an illustration of the Houses of Parliament. The relevance is obvious since, due to his role, Churchill spent a lot of time here. But behind the building is a symbol that some may not recognise. As well as a statesman, Churchill was an artist and writer as well, and in 1953 he won the prestigious Nobel Prize for Literature. This mysterious symbol on the back of the £5 note is, in fact, a sketch of the Nobel medal.

The final design connection to Churchill, and displayed on a circular, green foil patch – another method of limiting fake copies – is the word “BLENHEIM”. Blenheim Palace in Oxfordshire was the family home and place of birth of Winston Churchill. The name today is still largely associated with the former Prime Minister.

On the other side, the side considered the front of the note, is the same portrait of the Queen that featured on the paper version. But what really differentiates the new from the old, other than the material, is the see-through window on the left-hand side of the note. This hallmark will make it a lot harder to counterfeit, especially as the window contains a finely detailed metallic image of the Elizabeth Tower. When viewed from the front, the tower appears to be gold, however, on the reverse, it shines silver.

£10, £20, and £50

The Bank of England proposes to reproduce the £10 and £20 note in the same polymer material but has yet to decide whether to manufacture the more recent £50 in this manner. This summer (2017) is the intended season to begin issuing the polymer £10, however, the polymer £20 will not come into circulation until 2020.

These new notes give the nation the opportunity to honour other historical figures. Jane Austen is set to appear on the £10 note and J.M.W. Turner will take pride of place on the £20. In the meantime, Charles Darwin and Adam Smith continue to star on the British paper notes.

Since the design change of the £5 has brought attention to the relevance of the background illustrations, it has increased the awareness of detail on the notes that have been in circulation for years. Looking closely at the £20 note, the design begins to make sense. Adam Smith’s portrait stares forward at an illustration of a pin factory. This is something Smith used to describe the benefits of the division of labour in his book An Inquiry into the Nature and Causes of the Wealth of Nations. The £10 note, on the other hand, contains a combination of images. Since Charles Darwin was a naturalist, flora, fauna and a nautilus shell are used to represent the species he discovered whilst travelling the world aboard the ship HMS Beagle (also features in the illustration). Other elements are made up of a compass and magnifying glass.

Matthew Boulton, the face of the £50 note, was a manufacturer and business partner of James Watt, a famous Scottish engineer. They were both involved with the Industrial Revolution, which had a serious impact on Britain, thus making them significant people to remember. To illustrate Boulton’s role, images of a factory, cogs and wheels, and the Whitbread Steam Engine, adorn the background of the note.

5-pound-note-white-fiver

However, the inclusion of portraits on British money is only a recent idea. When the first Bank of England notes were issued, they were handwritten, denoting the amount they were worth. This is presumably where the idea of cheques developed from. Eventually, the notes were printed by machine, but it was not until the 20th century that colour and calligraphic design began to appear.

The only monarch to feature on British paper money is the current queen, Queen Elizabeth II. Her portrait was first used in 1960, seven years after her coronation. Notes have since been gradually updated throughout the Queen’s life in order to keep the portrait up-to-date.

For a decade, Queen Elizabeth II was the only person – discounting Britannia who has been on every note from the very start – to feature on British notes. The 1970s brought about the commencement of historical character designs, beginning with William Shakespeare on the £20.

Since then, numerous famous people have been displayed on notes of all values. The £5 note has been home to the portraits of the Duke of Wellington (1971), George Stephenson (1990) and Elizabeth Fry (2002). The £10 note featured Florence Nightingale (1975), Charles Dickens (1991) and Charles Darwin (2000). The £20: Shakespeare (1970), Michael Faraday (1991), Sir Edward Elgar (1999), and, as already mentioned, Adam Smith (2007). Other people to have been used are Sir Isaac Newton (£1, 1975), Sir Christopher Wren (£50, 1981), and Sir John Houblon (£50, 1994).

The notes all have security features to determine whether they are real, for instance, the watermark of the Queen that only appears when held up to a light. What many people do not realise, the way of being sure whether the money is real or fake, is a hidden number that cannot be seen by the naked eye. To see these numbers, an ultra-violet light is needed to reveal the red and green fluorescent ink on the front (Queen side) of the note.

The Bank of England Museum has an ultra-violet light for visitors to test their own money with. The special dye has been used on all notes produced by the bank, so if no hidden number lights up, you are in trouble!

To see the changes in note design from the 1700s until the present day, the Bank of England Museum has a timeline of the changes on display for everyone to see. It is interesting to discover how different the old money looks, yet also how similar the design is too. Coins are also exhibited, which go back further than the present Queen, to feature the heads of previous monarchs.

As well as bank notes, the museum also focuses on the history of the Bank of England, for example, the early years, 1694-1800; the Rotunda, 1800-1946; and the modern economy, 1946 until the present day. There are many hands-on activities for children (and adults) to play with, from jigsaw puzzles to interactive screens. And, most importantly, do not forget to (attempt) to pick up the genuine gold bar!

The Bank of England Museum is located on Bartholomew Lane, London, EC2R 8AH, and is free entry to all visitors.

The Pros and Cons of Digital Technology in Relation to Illustration

The following essay was originally written in 2011 during my second year studying BA Graphic Design.

This essay will talk about the development of technology from the 15th century until the digital technology of today. It will also explore in detail the effects, both positive and negative, of digital technology in relation to illustration.

Over thousands of years the idea of what illustration is has changed, especially in recent years. Illustration most likely began with someone drawing in the dirt with their finger however now illustrations are being produced for book covers, magazines, posters, websites, and so on. (Zeegen, 2009)

Over the past six or so centuries, technology has developed in ways that have changed the process of producing written and illustrative work. “It is hard to imagine a world in which every image was unique. Prior to the fifteenth century, images were not only-one-of-a-kind but rare.” (Thompson, 2003) [Online] Before the fifteenth century, all illustrated books were produced by hand, making them also very rare. (Mugnai, 2009a) This would have taken time meaning that books and illustrations would have been expensive due to the limited amounts of copies. So at this time copies of books or even the originals would have been found in select places of status such as palaces and churches. (Thompson, 2003)

During the 1400s the printing press was developed by Johannes Guttenberg resulting in the ability to reproduce thousands of identical images. However it was possible to reproduce images before this. In Europe in the 1390s woodcuts were used which then led onto etching and engraving in the middle ages. Some examples of etching are the illustrations by H.K. Browne for Charles Dickens’ novels. (Fig. 1) By the nineteenth century artists were finding ways to add colour into their prints. Books were now becoming easier and quicker to produce and hence costs were reduced rapidly. (Kreis, 2004) This also meant that individual people could then own a copy of a book rather than having to go to other places to look at or be read to from one.

Once methods of printing had been invented there were less hand-drawn books being produced. By the end of the 18th century lithography was invented but this was soon replaced by the end of the 19th century with “photomechanical processes that made possible the reproduction of a wide variety of painting and drawing techniques.” (Columbia University Press, 2007) [Online] The 19th century saw the development of the Golden Age of the Victorian Illustration and also the beginning of the Golden Age of Illustration in America. This period saw a rise in printed book and magazine illustration due to the developments in printing technology. Illustrators from this time were inspired by pre-Raphaelite art, Japanese colour prints and art nouveau style. (Wigan, 2009)

After the two world wars illustration styles changed as illustrators were influenced by the different artistic movements of the time, such as, Pop Art and Photorealism. (Mugnai, 2009c)

In the world today methods of illustration are completely different to those of the past. Bruce Wands suggests, “Computers and the Internet have revolutionized the way people communicate and how they produce media” (Wands, 2000:p40). Styles of illustration have changed to fit the growing developments, such as more visual content is needed on websites and blogs therefore digital approaches to illustrations have increased. (Tallon, 2008)

Picasso once said, “computers are worthless. They can only give you answers.” (Zeegen, 2007b:p41) However as Picasso died in 1973 he was not alive to see the development of digital illustration. In recent years the computer has provided illustrators with an additional means in the process of creating their work.

Digital technology was the next step for illustration and has altered the nature of the discipline. “The digital revolution would take no prisoners – it was clear, adapt or die!” (Computer Arts, 2006) [Online] It was in the early 1980s that the computer began to be used for illustration. At this time computer screens could not display extensive colours and everything was displayed in a low resolution. Therefore Pixel illustration, “is arguably where the whole digital illustration shebang began” (Goldman, 2011) [Online]

Although Goldman argues that digital illustration began in the 80s he also mentions that a different kind of illustration emerged in the 1990s. Adobe Photoshop fully emerged at the beginning of the decade but in 1995 once the software had been developed “digital photo illustration was born.” (Goldman, 2011) [Online]

Soon, although there were illustrators who still preferred to produce their work by hand, less hand drawn illustrations were being used in magazines or on book covers and “images composed of squiggles and geometric shapes, courtesy of Adobe and Apple” (Stermer,2000:p30) began to appear instead.

The invention of programmes such as Photoshop meant that illustrators could edit their work digitally. For example, as Wands pointed out, illustrators could now work purely in black and white then scan their work into a computer and using digital software manipulate elements and apply colour on screen. This meant that artists no longer had to spend hours producing everything by hand and starting again when corrections were required. As well as Photoshop there was Adobe Illustrator, which allowed artists to create illustrations and enlarge them to any size due to the flexibility of such vector software. (Wands, 2000)

Photoshop and other software in theory offer more savings in relation to production. Today many comic book artists draw their work by hand but choose to add colour using digital software. In Goldman’s article he mentions another specialised software, Corel Painter. In similar ways to Photoshop this programme can be used to edit illustrations and photographs or create illustrations from scratch, however in a way that can imitate “the way that watercolour Paints behave when wet, with drips, runs and splashes.” (Goldman, 2011) [Online] This software is time saving as it is possible to produce something comparatively quickly with it, whereas to do the same by hand, for many people, would take a long time as the artist or illustrator may not have skills in a range of media and digital simulation may offer an alternative solution.

Digital technology has given those that are not confident at drawing by hand the opportunity to become illustrators. Computers have opened up new styles of illustration such as Pixel Illustration, as mentioned earlier, and Vector Art. Vector Art is an appropriate type of illustration to be used on websites as files are small in size whilst retaining clarity and are quick to download. Vector illustrations can also be reproduced at any scale without losing clarity and sharpness. Artists usually use photos or hand drawn materials as a template to draw around using digital software. (Goldman, 2011)

However, even though digital technology has become popular in relation to illustration, this does not mean that all illustration has to be entirely digital. Since the development of digital technology there has been a rise in multimedia art. This is where more than one type of media is used within an artwork for example painting, print and photography, and now more recently, digital images. This style of art was fairly popular in the 1990s where technological advancements were giving illustrators and designers new methods to experiment with. (Mèredieu, 2003)

Dave McKean is an example of an illustrator that uses a multimedia approach in his work. He has made many illustrations for book covers, CD covers and graphic novels. He has become widely known for his work with the writer, Neil Gaiman. McKean uses the computer to layer his multimedia compositions, a lot of which are often made by hand. He has a fairly positive opinion about the use of digital technology when producing illustrations. He has suggested that with a computer there is “obviously incredible control” (Miller, 2004) [Online] and it is a good way of layering images no matter what the media; digital or handmade work. McKean is a skilled draughtsman so combines traditional practices with the flexibility offered by digital software. (Fig.2)

His main negative view of digital technology is not one that really relates to illustration work but only that people end up spending most of their time sitting in front of a computer. He also says that many people assume that it is possible to use digital software to edit photographs to get the required affect, however depending on the image this is not always possible.

Despite McKean having positive views on digital technology he believes that illustration is in trouble. “I’m sure this is just the computer’s honeymoon period, but in the meantime, illustrators are having a tough time getting work.” (Miller, 2004) [Online]

Although digital technology has its positive aspects there are other people who have negative views on such developments. Roger Parker believes “recent advances in computer imaging are blurring the line between photos and illustrations”. (Parker, 1998:p93) Caplin and Banks tell us to “forget the ‘photograph’. Nowadays it is just another word for an image. All images are images, however they are produced.” (2003:p6) Françoise Holtz-Bonneau points out that digital images produced on a computer are either overly geometric or they are “excessively realistic in an all too perfect way”. (Mèredieu, 2003:p109) Rick Poynor argues that illustration generated using a computer has become “predictable and trite”. (1999) [Online] Many people have learnt how to use digital methods to produce illustrations, which after a while have become similar and clichéd.

As now it is not essential to be able to draw to be able to produce illustrations, Milton Glaser argues that the invention of computers has made illustrators unnecessary. (Arisman, 2000) If people can produce their own illustrations easily then they will not need to hire illustrators to do this for them. Karl Marx predicted a society where there would not be any professional artists as all people would be artists. “The particular way in which art is expanding and becoming diluted at present” would not please Marx, however he did foresee the possibility of these things occurring such as the blurring of the boundaries of the disciplines. (Mèredieu, 2003:p222)

“Anyone with a computer and a printer now has an artist’s studio, photography studio, film studio, printing press, and laboratory on their desk.” (Herriott, 2009:p6) Although this was said as a positive response to the advancements of technology, it backs up Marx’s view that it is possible that all men will be artists. Everyone will have access to technology that gives them the ability to make their own illustrations, which “makes illustrators unnecessary”. (Arisman, 2000:p55)

Neil Churcher writes about Marion Deuchars, a tutor from the Royal College of Art, in an article saying that she believes that drawing by hand, for example into a sketchbook, shows that the illustrator has design skills. However she thinks that computer aided design has lessened this importance as now it appears the most important thing is digital visualisation. Churcher refers to the graphic designer, Phil Carter, who says that “drawing is a skill that is sadly being lost”. (Churcher, 2002) [Online]

Steven Heller writes in his essay, The End of Illustration, that people are digitally changing aspects of others art works without their permission. (Heller, 2000) Therefore some artists have “willingly offered their pictures, carefully crafted over a career of individual commissions, to be used and misused… altered beyond recognition on attribution.” (Stermer, 2000:p30)

Milton Glaser has written about how he was once approached about a business plan, which would involve compiling a disk of illustrations that people could buy and use as they wished. So someone could buy the disk and then “use any image, for any purpose, modified as desired, combined with any other images, recoloured, reshaped, reconfigured… forever.” Illustrations, therefore, would no longer be unique. (Glaser, 1997:p258)

Glaser fears that the profession of illustration will eventually disappear especially if business plans such as these go ahead and succeed. If people are able to get their hands on such disks then the professional illustrator would no longer be needed or even wanted because, as Glaser points out, it is doubtful that clients will want to pay for illustrations when something similar could be acquired for nothing. For persisting image-makers, such as illustrators, artists and photographers, there is the risk they will not be well known, as they will just be “reduced to the level of anonymous image providers.” (Glaser, 1997:p259) If a disk such as this had ever been produced then illustrations would have become standard images that would get overused and boring. On the other hand, because of the overuse of the same illustrations again and again, people may desire new original visual approaches.

Traditionally a work of art was a unique thing as it was made only the once; there was only one copy. Nevertheless, once technology began to develop it was possible to make copies of these unique art works. The copy, however, would “lack the authenticity and aura of the original work, so be worthless.” (Hillis Miller, 1992:p20)

“That which withers in the age of mechanical reproduction is the aura of the work of art.” (Benjamin, 1936) [Online] Walter Benjamin wrote an essay in which he suggested the idea of aura in relation to artwork and the effect that mechanical reproduction had on this. By reproducing a work of art, for example, it is removing the original from its “domain of tradition”. (Benjamin, 1936) [Online] So even if the reproduction of the artwork is faultless, it is still lacking in something: “its presence in time and space”. (Benjamin, 1936) [Online] The work of art has been removed out of its original context. For example a religious painting would have an aura in the museum or church in which it is displayed, but this aura would be destroyed if it were to be used as a magazine cover as it has been removed from its original domain. Technology has also changed peoples reaction towards hand produced art because original artwork, such as a painting, was only “viewed by one person or by a few” (Benjamin, 1936) [Online] and its aura could only be appreciated by these people. However, once copies could be produced, these art works, now lacking in aura, were viewable by the public who would not value them in the same way as someone who viewed them in their original domain.

This essay was written before the digital technologies of today, as the first computers did not appear until the 1940s (Mèredieu, 2003). However Benjamin’s argument is still relevant today because it can be applied to digital technologies.

The idea of a loss of aura is evident in “photographs of photographs, photocopies of photocopies, and copies of video tapes” (Mitchell, 2004:p5) where each copy has a lower quality than the original. Matt Soar mentioned this idea of an aura: “that illustration beginning with the hand and ending with pens, brushes, or pencils has an affective quality – an aura”. (Soar, 2000:p33) He says that this quality cannot be created by digital processes such as photography and computer software.

Another example of this lack of aura are photographs of things. A photograph of an object is just that, a photograph of an object. By looking at it no one actually sees the original object, what is actually seen is “the original of a reproduction – with all the associated loss of aura.” (Rodman, 2007) [Online] Howard Rodman uses as an example the Eiffel Tower. The actual tower has an aura whereas the postcards, t-shirts and other merchandises do not have this aura.

Lucinda Rogers is an illustrator who produces everything by hand. This consists of mainly reportage drawing which involves her drawing on the spot. Deuchars says that when drawing no one can tell what the final outcome will be like, or whether it will be good, until it is finished. “You have to let it go on its own journey. What you have to do is to start without thinking.” (Churcher, 2002) [Online] With digital technology this is not possible in the same way.

Although many believe digital technology to have caused problems for illustrators and maybe even the end of illustration, Zeegen writes that before digital illustration grew in popularity, illustration was “only moments away from the final nail being hammered into the coffin.” (2010) [Online] Whereas some illustrators believed that all was not well for illustration, Zeegen (2007a) [Online] poses the question “Where did it all go right?” Therefore, digital technology has for some brought new life into the discipline, especially, as Zeegen also points out, through the growth of the Internet where “illustration has become more noticed on an increasingly global scale”. (Zeegen, 2010) [Online]

Overall there are many different opinions about digital technology and its effect on illustration. A Scottish illustrator, Bernie Reid assumes that digital illustration will begin to decline, whereas Michelle Thompson has expressed the view that she believes that both hand-rendered and digital illustration can both exist together especially as image-makers are benefitting from digital techniques within their hand produced illustrations. Peter Arkle, another illustrator, feels that there should be a growing interest in work that shows evidence of being produced by a human hand even if some of the illustration is digital as it really stands out. (Hyland and Bell, 2003)

Although digital technology may be an exciting new method and has made it easier and quicker to produce illustrations, Steven Wilson, who has done illustrations for The Guardian argues that it is “only as exciting as the ideas you have inside your head”. (Computer Arts, 2006) [Online] So illustrators are still needed to come up with the ideas for illustrations. Emily Alston, who uses digital methods, points out that “every illustrator and designer has the very same technology available to them, and if everyone uses the tools in the same way, nothing would ever stand out as different or original.” (Computer Arts, 2006) [Online]

Caplin and Banks believe that digital technology is a positive thing due to the fact that designs and illustrations can be produced faster than by hand but also they point out that “from cave painting on, image making has followed technological advancements and will continue to do so.” (2003:p7) So just as with development of the printing press, lithography and so on, digital technology is simply the next advancement of an ancient and continually evolving process.

On the whole digital technology has had a positive effect on illustration as it has brought new opportunities and methods to the field. With the development of technology, illustrations have become quicker to produce both from the reproduction point of view, with the development of the printing press and later computers; and also in producing the original image, thanks to digital software. There are, on the other hand, negative view points about digital technology as some artists fear that the more traditional methods will be abandoned and that the profession of illustrators will slowly decline because of the ability of everyone being able to produce or copy others work using software available to all. Overall, every time that technology advances, illustration is able to adapt to the new methods of producing, whilst still being able to integrate traditional methods. Therefore, digital technology is the next step in the continually evolving creative activity known as illustration.

6

Fig. 1

Browne, H. (1849) My Musical Breakfast [Online]. Available from http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/4/4f/Pickwick_papers27.jpg/220px-Pickwick_papers27.jpg [Accessed: 16th November 2011]

1

Fig. 2

McKean, D. (2008) Big Fat Duck Cookbook Sample 8 [Online]. Available from http://www.mckean-art.co.uk/ [Accessed: 16th November 2011]

References

Arisman, M. (2000) Toward a Holistic Procession: An Interview with Milton Glaser In: Heller, S. and Arisman, M. (eds.) The Education of an Illustrator New York, Allworth Press. P.53-57

Benjamin, W. (1936) The Work of Art in the Age of Mechanical Reproduction Translated by A. Blenden (2005) [Online]. Available from http://www.marxists.org/reference/subject/philosophy/works/ge/benjamin.htm [Accessed: 1st November 2011]

Caplin, S. and Banks, A. (2003) The Complete Guide to Digital Illustration Lewes, ILEX

Churcher, N. (2002) Drawing Out Ideas [Online]. Available from http://www.lucindarogers.co.uk/design-week.html [Accessed: 13th November 2011]

Columbia University Press. (2007) Illustration [Online]. Available from http://www.infoplease.com/ce6/ent/A0824994.html [Accessed: 30th October 2011]

Computer Arts. (2006) Digital Illustration [Online]. Available from http://www.computerarts.co.uk/features/digital-illustration [Accessed: 11th November 2011]

Glaser, M. (1997) The End of Illustration (Or the War is Over, Part 2) In: Heller, S. and Finamore, M (eds.) Design Culture: An Anthology of Writing from the Aiga Journal of Graphic Design New York, Allworth Press

Goldman, R. (2011) Digital Art: Explore Illustration [Online]. Available from http://www.streetdirectory.com/travel_guide/114366/programming/digital_art_explore_illustration.html [Accessed: 31st October 2011]

Heller, S. (2000) The End of Illustration In: Heller, S. and Arisman, M. (eds.) The Education of an Illustrator New York, Allworth Press. P.23-28

Herriott, L. (ed.) (2009) 500 Digital Illustration Hints, Tips and Techniques Hove, RotoVision

Hillis Miller, J. (1992) Illustration London, Reaktion Books Limited

Hyland, A. and Bell, R. (2003) Hand to Eye: Contemporary Illustration London, Laurence King

Kreis, S. (2004) The Printing Press [Online]. Available from http://www.historyguide.org/intellect/press.html [Accessed: 30th October 2011]

de Mèredieu, F.(2003) Digital and Video Art Translated by R. Elliott (2005) Edinburgh, Chambers Harrap Publishers Ltd

Miller, J. (2004) Dave McKean: Dark Digital Art [Online] Available from http://www.bulletsofautumn.com/mckean-art/readings/Dark_digital_art_2004.html [Accessed: 9th November 2011]

Mitchell, W J. (2004) The Reconfigured Eye: Visual Truth in the Post-Photographic Era Cambridge, Massachusetts Institute of Technology

Mugnai, F. (2009a) A Brief History of Illustration (Part I) [Online]. Available from http://blogof.francescomugnai.com/2009/11/a-brief-history-of-illustration-part-i/ [Accessed: 2nd November 2011]

Mugnai, F. (2009c) A Brief History of Illustration (Part III) [Online]. Available from http://blogof.francescomugnai.com/2009/11/a-brief-history-of-illustration-part-iii/ [Accessed: 2nd November 2011]

Parker, R. (1998) Looking Good in Print 4th Ed., Arizona, The Coriolis Group Inc

Poynor, R. (1999) Illustrate This [Online]. Available from http://www.frieze.com/issue/article/illustrate_this/ [Accessed: 9th November 2011]

Rodman, H (2007) Authorship in the Digital Age In: August, J. Authorship in the Digital Age [Online]. Available from http://johnaugust.com/2007/authorship-in-the-digital-age [Accessed: 31st October]

Soar, M. (2000) It Begins with “Ill” and Ends With “Digital”:The Riddle of Illustration’s Declining Fortunes In: Heller, S. and Arisman, M. (eds.) The Education of an Illustrator New York, Allworth Press. P.32-35

Stermer, D. (2000) What the Hell Happened to Illustration? In: Heller, S. and Arisman, M. (eds.) The Education of an Illustrator New York, Allworth Press. P.29-31

Tallon, K. (2008) Digital Fashion Illustration with Photoshop and Illustrator London, Anova Books Company Ltd

Thompson, W. (2003) The Printed Image in the West: History and Techniques [Online]. Available from http://www.metmuseum.org/toah/hd/prnt/hd_prnt.htm [Accessed: 30th October 2011]

Wands, B. (2000) The Influence of Computers and the Internet on Illustration In: Heller, S. and Arisman, M. (eds.) The Education of an Illustrator New York, Allworth Press. P.40-47

Wigan, M. (2009) The Visual Dictionary of Illustration London, AVA Publishing SA

Zeegen, L. (2007a) Illustration Renaissance [Online]. Available from http://computerarts.co.uk/features/illustration-renaissance [Accessed: 11th November 2011]

Zeegen, L. (2007b) Secrets of Digital Illustration: a Master Class in Commercial Image Making Hove, RotaVision SA

Zeegen, L. (2009) What is Illustration? Hove, RotoVision SA

Zeegen, L. (2010) A Decade of Illustration [Online]. Available from http://www.computerarts.co.uk/features/decade-illustration [Accessed: 11th November 2011]

 

Secondary Resources

Ascot, R. and Shanken, E. (2003) Telematic Embrace: Visionary Theories of Art, Technology, and Consciousness Berkley, University of California Press

Grau, O. (2003) Visual Art: From Illusion to Immersion Cambridge, Massachusetts Institute of Technology

Heller, S. (2004) Ode to Illustration [Online]. Available from http://www.aiga.org/ode-to-illustration/ [Accessed: 24th October 2011]

Male, A. (2007) Illustration: A Theoretical and Contextual Perspective Lausanne, AVA Publishing

Mugnai, F. (2009b) A Brief History of Illustration (Part II) [Online]. Available from http://blogof.francescomugnai.com/2009/11/a-brief-history-of-illustration-part-ii/ [Accessed: 2nd November 2011]

Mugnai, F. (2009d) A Brief History of Illustration (Part IV) [Online]. Available from http://blogof.francescomugnai.com/2009/12/a-brief-history-of-illustration-part-iv/ [Accessed: 2nd November 2011]

Mugnai, F. (2009e) A Brief History of Illustration (Final) [Online]. Available from http://blogof.francescomugnai.com/2009/12/a-brief-history-of-illustration-final/ [Accessed: 2nd November 2011]

Triggs, T. (2000) What am I? In: Heller, S. and Arisman, M. (eds.) The Education of an Illustrator New York, Allworth Press. P.49

Wood, F. (2002) China: The Invention of Printing [Online]. Available from http://www.fathom.com/feature/122327/index.html [Accessed: 30th October 2011]

 

 

The (Road) Signs of Typography

sign-giving-order-no-overtaking

From the moment we learn to read, typography has a significant impact on our lives. Without intending to, we absorb thousands of words a day, sometimes even beginning before we get out of bed. Posters dominate the walls of our towns, shops have unique lettering adorning their fronts, and even clothes often come decorated with typographic slogans.

Typography for many people evokes images of decorative lettering, expressive catchphrases, logos and artistic alphabets – such designs that have obviously been thought out and painstakingly developed. What tends to be forgotten is that every written word is a form of typography. Typefaces, including what you are reading now, have been designed; yet, apart from designers, fonts and such like are often dismissed or taken for granted.

One particular typographic design that we see everyday is displayed on road signs throughout the country. How many people look at a sign on the side of a busy motorway and admire the typeface, the layout, kerning, leading etc? No one does. We think, “Thank goodness that sign was there otherwise I would have missed my turning,” or “I’m glad that sign was there, otherwise this roundabout would be very confusing.”

So, who is the genius behind the helpful and effective road signs around Britain? In fact, it was a project by two designers executed at the turn of the 1960s. Jock Kinneir (1917-1994) and Margaret Calvert (1936) are the people who took on the ambitious project to create an easily deciphered signage system that, not only modernised British roads, influenced the rest of the world.

Since tomorrow, 11th February 2017, would have been Kinneir’s 100th birthday, I thought it worth learning about the designer(s) of a system that we now take for granted. Using carefully placed letters, numbers, symbols and colours, Kinneir and his assistant took on the most ambitious information design project to date, and made our roads, and the ever increasing motorways, a much safer thoroughfare to navigate.

When Jock Kinneir took on this project in 1957, he was already a proficient and admired graphic designer. Born in Hampshire, he developed the taste for art and design, resulting in enrolling onto an engraving course at the Chelsea School of Art. Due to the war, his career did not take off straightaway, however he eventually gained a position in the Central Office of Information as an exhibition designer. By 1956, Kinneir had opened his own studio and was teaching at the same school he attended on a part time basis.

Kinneir’s first major project was developing the signage system at Gatwick Airport, which was only just opening for public use. It is at this stage that Kinneir began his partnership with Margaret Calvert. Studying for a National Diploma in Design, Kinnier recognised her illustration skills and employed her to help him produce artworks and drawings for this notable project.

It was through the results of the Gatwick project that Kinneir and Calvert landed themselves with the road sign commission. At this period of time, motorways were only just being introduced to the UK, meaning that the existing signs were virtually illegible and un-thought-out having been erected many years after the roads were originally paved. Kinneir and Calvert’s job was to work alongside the development of the new roads, developing a coherent system that would be easy to read and understand when driving at high speeds.

It was agreed that a combination of upper and lower case was more legible than the standard block capitals that previous sign-makers had utilised. This meant that an appropriate typeface had to be designed or procured. By adapting the preexisting typeface Akzidenz-Grotesk, a sans serif font originally released in Germany, the pair generated a softer, friendlier version, now known as Transport. The signs themselves sported a blue background with white type, which was easy for drivers to spot against the backdrop of the British countryside as well as the stretch of tarmac ahead of them – both during the daytime and at night.

The motorway signage system was such a success that Kinneir and Calvert were asked to design the other, now familiar, signs on the rest of Britain’s roads. These include the simple triangle signs dotted about our roads, as well as the large green boards on the sides of primary roads, and the white versions on the others.

Calvert was responsible for the pictograms that many of our signs display. It was felt that, on occasion, it was easier to show a command using a symbol, rather than a lengthy instruction that drivers would not have time to read. Now, whenever a driver spots a silhouette of a boy holding hands with a little girl, they know to be extra vigilant of children running around in the area.

Kinneir and Calvert later went on to work with British Rail, hospitals and the army, designing signage systems that were so successful that they are still in place today. Imagine the perplexity of navigating around the country without any clear guidance!

John Kinneir died in 1994, but his legacy remains. Of course, his (and Calvert’s) design has altered slightly, the more developed towns, roads and cities become – unfortunately making some areas rather confusing – however, Kinneir is mostly forgotten, as the public take road signs for granted.

“It is sad but true to say that most of us take our surroundings for granted. Direction signs and street names, for instance, are as vital as a drop of oil in an engine, without which the moving parts would seize up; one can picture the effect of the removal of this category of information on drivers in a busy city or on pedestrians trying to find their way in a large building complex. It is a need which has bred a sub-division of graphic design with more influence on the appearance of our surroundings than any other.” – Kinneir, 1965

Next time you are on the streets, whether driving or walking, take a look at the signs you pass. Appreciate their simple design, the use of colour, the clarity of the typeface. These signs did not just appear there, they have been carefully thought out for your benefit. Try not to take them for granted, and make an effort to remember both Kinneir and Calvert’s names – you never know, they may come up in a pub quiz one day!

navigation

2016 Finale

Well here it is, the end of a year – and what a year it has been. My new years resolution for 2016 was to start posting regularly on this blog – once a week – which, apart from the week I spent abroad, has been successfully achieved. From my own artwork to exhibitions I have visited, I have covered a broad range of creative topics, and rekindled my enjoyment of both drawing and writing.

The images above are a few of my final sketches this year. In November I decided to stop attending art group (for a number of reasons) but remained determined to produce a drawing once a week – and to prove it, there they are! As you can see, however, I have not been that adventurous, preferring to stick with monotone tonal drawings. I did, on the other hand, experiment with water-soluble graphite (pic.2), although I think I need to practice my technique a bit more.

1As well as drawing, I have spent the year colouring – books and loose sheets. I would not be surprised if I counted them up to have completed a hundred or so! I have reviewed a couple of the books I own, but you can expect more within the next year.

One of the more recent colouring sheets I enjoyed working on is this picture of candles and poinsettia. This was for a colouring competition, so I used it as an opportunity to really focus on the colours and tones I was using. I think this make the final image more affective in comparison to single block colours.

 

My Number One Drawing, 2016

7

The piece of art I am most proud of is the cyberman a drew as part of a task in the book Think. Draw. Create. On this particular page, the task was to “transform the emptiness” which I decided meant “do want you want”. I had already attempted an illustration using fine liners and pointillism, which I was pleased with, so decided to have another go.

I think this technique looks really effective, and I like how the different pen thicknesses help to create different tones. The downside to this method, however, is the length of time it takes. I produced this illustration over a couple of weeks, working for no more than half an hour at a time. It is very tiring to sit and dot the paper over and over again, and before long your wrist begins to ache.

I’m not setting a definitive resolution for 2017 – too much stress – but I hope I get the chance, and the energy, to try producing more art work in this style. I also aim to continue blogging on a weekly basis, and already have a few ideas to write about in the coming weeks.

Thank you to everyone who has followed this blog or at least taken the time to read a post once in a while. I wish you all the best for 2017.

 

Merry Christmas

2016-copyHave a Cool Yule!

What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?

Horn-aments!

Did Rudolph go to school?
No. He was Elf-taught!

What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

A Politically Correct Christmas 
Anon

Twas the night before Christmas and Santa’s a wreck…
How to live in a world that’s politically correct?
His workers no longer would answer to “Elves”,
“Vertically Challenged” they were calling themselves.
And labor conditions at the North Pole,
were alleged by the union, to stifle the soul.

Four reindeer had vanished without much propriety,
released to the wilds, by the Humane Society.
And equal employment had made it quite clear,
that Santa had better not use just reindeer.
So Dancer and Donner, Comet and Cupid,
were replaced with 4 pigs, and you know that looked stupid!

The runners had been removed from his beautiful sleigh,
because the ruts were deemed dangerous by the EPA,
And millions of people were calling the Cops,
when they heard sled noises upon their roof tops.
Second-hand smoke from his pipe, had his workers quite frightened,
and his fur trimmed red suit was called “unenlightened”.

To show you the strangeness of today’s ebbs and flows,
Rudolf was suing over unauthorized use of his nose.
He went to Geraldo, in front of the Nation,
demanding millions in over-due workers compensation.

So…half of the reindeer were gone, and his wife
who suddenly said she’d had enough of this life,
joined a self help group, packed and left in a whiz,
demanding from now on that her title was Ms.

And as for gifts…why, he’d never had the notion
that making a choice could cause such commotion.
Nothing of leather, nothing of fur…
Which meant nothing for him or nothing for her.
Nothing to aim, Nothing to shoot,
Nothing that clamored or made lots of noise.
Nothing for just girls and nothing for just boys.
Nothing that claimed to be gender specific,
Nothing that’s warlike or non-pacifistic.

No candy or sweets…they were bad for the tooth.
Nothing that seemed to embellish upon the truth.
And fairy tales…while not yet forbidden,
were like Ken and Barbie, better off hidden,
for they raised the hackles of those psychological,
who claimed the only good gift was one ecological.

No baseball, no football…someone might get hurt,
besides – playing sports exposed kids to dirt.
Dolls were said to be sexist and should be passe.
and Nintendo would rot your entire brain away.

So Santa just stood there, disheveled and perplexed,
he just couldn’t figure out what to do next?
He tried to be merry he tried to be gay,
but you must have to admit he was having a very bad day.
His sack was quite empty, it was flat on the ground,
nothing fully acceptable was anywhere to be found.

Something special was needed, a gift that he might,
give to us all, without angering the left or the right.
A gift that would satisfy – with no indecision,
each group of people in every religion.
Every race, every hue,
everyone, everywhere…even you!
So here is that gift, it’s price beyond worth…
“May you and your loved ones enjoy peace on Earth.”